A musical résumé of my life before the apocalypse | WEEKEND WIND UP #70


{pic: via Pinterest/http://www.onthemarqueeblog.com/2009_05_01_archive.html}

And now, the end is here
And so I face the final curtain
My friend, I’ll say it clear
I’ll state my case, of which I’m certain
I’ve lived a life that’s full
I traveled each and ev’ry highway
And more, much more than this, I did it my way

I feel like Frank Sinatra’s ‘My Way’ seems like the best soundtrack to the last week of our lives. If you believe in any of the countless apocalypse theories, Maya speculations and doomsday prophecies, that is. People have been speculating for over a year now whether the world will come to an end on December 21 and I reckon with 2012 coming to an end also, this is the perfect time for a little resumée anyway. All in all, I’m quite happy with my life, I reckon. I feel privileged to having been able to study journalism overseas, work in London and then even change professions to now become a pastry chef. And I’ve travelled a lot, too. People seem to find my CV rather unusual, but hey, at least I can say: I did it my way.

Regrets, I’ve had a few 
But then again, too few to mention 
I did what I had to do and saw it through without exemption 
I planned each charted course, each careful step along the byway 
And more, much more than this, I did it my way 

On some days, I regret not having stayed in New Zealand when I had the chance. But like Frankie says: I did what I had to do and in the end it all turned out fine. Some other regrets relate to hasty decisions I made and little chances I missed, like not giving that cute guy your phone number or something like that.

Yes, there were times, I’m sure you knew 
When I bit off more than I could chew 
But through it all, when there was doubt 
I ate it up and spit it out 
I faced it all and I stood tall and did it my way 

This probably relates mostly to work… there were quite a few times when I thought I could easily do something when in the end it turned out to be trickier than expected. But that’s fine. It’s always a good experience to grow with the challenge.

I’ve loved, I’ve laughed and cried 
I’ve had my fill, my share of losing 
And now, as tears subside, I find it all so amusing 
To think I did all that 
And may I say, not in a shy way, 
“Oh, no, oh, no, not me, I did it my way” 

Especially in the last two or three years I lost a few people who meant a lot to me. The weird part is that I didn’t actually lose them, like, they didn’t die or something. They just stopped being part of my life for one reason or another. And others don’t take up an active role in my life anymore even though they still mean as much to me as they always did. Yet they decided to leave. My brother is one of them. He’s physically still here but I feel like the special bond between us went missing somehow. He’s almost like a stranger to me.

For what is a man, what has he got? 
If not himself, then he has naught 
To say the things he truly feels and not the words of one who kneels 
The record shows I took the blows and did it my way!

If you know me a little, you know that I tend to say what I think very straight forward. Must be tough sometimes when you hear my judgement, but I hate it when people are dishonest for the sake of friendliness. It makes life so complicated! Say what you truly feel, people! It might actually make the world a better place!

Yes, it was my way

Oh yes, this is my way!

P.S.: By the way, I don’t believe in any of the apocalypse theories. The Maya calender has actually ended months ago except nobody took the lap years into account when coming up with the date for the apocalypse. Also, someone must have broadcasted the rumour the end would come to an end on 12/12/12 – my facebook went all bonkers that day because of all these “OMG it’s the last day of our lives”-type messages. Ironically, they all came from my New Zealand friends. And ONLY from my New Zealand friends. So obviously, whoever spread that rumour only spread it over there.

P.P.S.: Speaking of 12/12/12… another thing people were waiting for that day was a big miracle to happen. You know, that “the-last-sequential-day-of-our-lives-surely-something-miraculous-will-happen” rubbish. Anyway, I decided NOT to hop on that train – but then I really had a small miracle of some sort happening to me. I had a really bad day at work and was a little unstable and on my way back home everything just stressed me out and I broke down crying. Imagine me, hands clenched around the steering wheel, tears running down my face, having a total meltdown. – And then there was this huge truck in front of me that got stuck in the middle of the old part of my town. The driver got out of the car, came to my window, which meant I stopped crying and tried to look normal, and asked me where the cement works were. And boy he was gorgeous! And he had this super-cute accent (he must have been from Luxembourg). So I showed him the way and we discussed whether his vehicle would fit through the tiny, narrow roads (it did) and when he took the wrong way, I honked and showed him the right way. Not a big deal, but it totally brightened my mood so when I left him at the cement works, I felt all cheery and happy again. Well… until I realised I hadn’t given my number. But you know, like Frankie said, regrets, I’ve had a few…

{Frank Sinatra: My Way lyrics © CHRYSALIS MUSIC GROUP, Universal Music Publishing Group, EMI Music Publishing, Warner/Chappell Music, Inc.}

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